Tough

Tomorrow is my first day back at work since May. It's going to be unbelievably hard to leave my girls tomorrow. I am going to miss reading books and playing blocks all day. I am going to miss my uninterrupted cuddle and play time with Harper while Payton naps every afternoon. I am going to miss listening to Payton's children's Bible CD every time I get in the car. I am going to miss the unprompted cuddles when both of my girls happen to be in my arms while we watch Mickey Mouse on t.v. or read a book together. I am going to miss my random conversations with Payton that make me laugh at the most unexpected times. I am going to miss her unprompted hugs, kisses, and I love you's. I am going to miss Harper's sweet smile and "conversations" that we have. I am going to miss not being exhausted and stressed out all the time. I (may) even miss the stressful moments when Payton is having a temper tantrum and Harper is crying. I feel like I am going to miss out on so much while I'm at work every day. I know that I will see them in the afternoons and on the weekends, but the time just doesn't compare. I want to make sure that my girls get the best of who I am, not the mom that comes home from work so tired from her day that all she wants to do is lay on the couch and be impatient.

It's going to be tough, there's no doubt about it. I have had a few meltdowns the past week, and I know I just have to move on. I have SO much to be thankful for: two healthy girls, a helpful husband, a wonderful job
28 precious fourth graders, coworkers that are also fabulous friends, most of which are praying for me because they know exactly how this feels, a mother who loves and spoils my children just as much as we do (or maybe even more). Just to name a few. I know I will be fine. I know that I am being selfish. I know that my girls will be so happy and hardly even know the difference. It still makes me sad.

I got a letter from a sweet student that I had two years ago in the mail just a few weeks ago. She was one of those that I will always hold dear to my heart. Maybe it was God reminding me that I have a purpose while I'm at school too. I really do love my job. I love the children. So, I'm going to do the best that I can and cherish every moment that I have at home.

I am so thankful for my sweet mama who selflessly takes care of everyone but herself. She doesn't hesitate to go above and beyond for me, my girls, my grandmother, or anybody else. Like I said, this whole thing is purely selfish. I'm pretty sure that Payton would rather spend every day at her house anyways :) Do you think she's going to have her hands full?

So I'll go to work tomorrow and do my best to have a happy heart. I will just come home as soon as I can and try to enjoy and soak up every minute!

It happened...

I have just been waiting on it to happen and it finally did. We were getting ready to leave the house this morning. I already had Harper in her car seat ready to go. I took out the first load of stuff (because of course it takes three trips to get the car loaded these days). Anyways, I came back in and Harper's car seat was in a different place in the living room. I asked Payton how her car seat got there and she simply responded, "I moved it because Harper wanted to watch t.v." What a thoughtful sister she is! Luckily she was in her car seat this time. I am just praying she doesn't just pick her up one day and decide to move her across the room. Poor Harper doesn't stand a chance. I guess on the upside she got to finish the Mickey Mouse episode with sister.

Lazy Labor Day

Labor Day this year didn't consist of lake fun as usual. Instead, it rained all. day. long. What do you do when it rains all day? Build a fort in the living room of course! Payton has really been into hiding when she plays lately. She loved getting all of her babies and any toys that she could find to put inside of her fort. We got a little cleaning done, but mostly enjoyed spending the day at home with all four of us.

2 Months

Our little Harper is TWO months old now! She has continued to add so much joy to our family. I have to admit that so far we have been blessed with two wonderful babies! She is pretty much always happy and just goes with the flow.

We just increased her bottles to 5 ounces this weekend. She went through a stage where she would take an ounce or two, and not want anymore. She seems to have gotten out of that and was rather irritated when she finished a bottle so we figured it was time. I can't say that we are on a set feeding schedule since she is still so inconsistent with her sleep times, but she is feeding every 3-4 hours.

This past week we were feeding her between 9 and 9:30 and she was sleeping until anywhere between 4 and 5!!! We were thrilled! She still loves to be swaddled at night. I have tried to make an effort to put her in her bed somewhat awake rather than getting her completely asleep. I feel like we didn't do that with Payton and it made it harder down the road. She still just cat naps wherever and isn't a fan of napping in her crib during the day.

I just love her little birth mark on her head.

Last weekend we tried her out int he bumbo. Of course we were right there since she's not quite ready and only kept her in there for a few seconds. She despises tummy time so we have got to figure out some way to build neck muscles.

She has gotten to where she loves to hang onto toys. If she's in the mood, she really enjoys her play mat and watching all of the toys while listening to the music and lights. She also loves the swing just like her sister. She's usually pretty happy if we put her in her swing...for a little while at least. She found her fists last week, and often tries to suck on her entire hand at once.

Her big sister loves to sing to her if she is crying. Her favorite is "Jesus Loves Me." Of course that makes a momma's heart melt! I joke that poor Harper will never know peace and quiet. I can already tell that the entertainment that her sister provides will make up for the chaos. She has already started watching her, and Payton loves to talk to her.

We went for her 2 month well visit today with Dr. Williams. Our growing girl weighed 10 lb. 9 oz. (45th%) was 23 in. long (75th%) and her head was 15.75 in. (75th%). She said she seemed perfectly healthy. I do think that her reflux has improved slightly with the zantac. At least now her spitting up doesn't seem painful like it did before.
Here she is happy before her shots.

Here she is after FOUR shots and her bandaids to make her boo-boo's better. (I apologize it is turned and for the dirty diaper laying beside her!)

Payton was sure to kiss them all better this afternoon! Regardless of the last post, she can be a precious angel at times. Harper been kind of fussy today and just wanting to be held. Of course, that's exactly what we've been doing. Happy 2 months precious girl!

Stinker

Me: Payton, please get up and take your toys to the living room.
Payton: NO!
Me: Payton, we don't tell mommy no. You need to follow directions please.
Payton: I wasn't talking to you, I was telling the door "no."

Lord, please give me guidance in disciplining this strong willed clever child!

First Day

I sent Payton off to her first day of two year old preschool this morning. Luckily, no tears were shed (much unlike last year) and she was happy as could be when I left her. I know it sounds crazy, but one of the first things that I thought of when I knew that I wouldn't be working at the beginning of the school year is that I could actually go to Meet the Teacher and her first day with her unlike last year. It's the little things like that make it so hard being a working mom. Anyways, luckily we have two great teachers this year, Mrs. Sanford and Mrs. Simms. We are so excited to have Abby as one of her teachers this year! She and I have been friends ever since I can remember, and I know that she will make sure Payton is taken care of (and hopefully not hold anything against me for her attitude). I had to get the traditional first day of school pictures, and I just couldn't resist getting one with little sister too!